The Yearning

I begin again,
Oh sweet soul how do you feel?
Sit beside me now and speak.
I respond with pondering this Life.
Living it is like being inside of a square
All the angles lead you on different paths
And guide you towards a direction
Somehow though we don’t see our way
Always wanting someone to tell us
“what is the right way?”
Yearning, searching, waiting to finally arrive
At the place we envision
The place we know we should be
This human condition
Of never being satisfied with what is
I too am sick of advise that tells us
To just embrace the now…
What if Now sucks???
I can’t tell you your way
But my way entangles love,
Pain, loss, fear and joy.
And of course that yearning
Maybe someday the yearning
Will settle down.
Maybe she will make peace with what is
And all that she truly has.

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This is Grief

It’s harsh at first, takes your breath away and brings you to your knees
You go on throughout your day and then you remember
Their voice, their laugh, the form of their mouth, their essence
How is it that the world carries on?
Don’t they know that everything is forever changed and will never be the same?
Of course we are never ready for it,
But you can’t prepare for death, even if you know it’s coming because you don’t really know until it finally occurs and you feel it in your bones.
Missing them doesn’t stop,
It’s like swimming in the ocean,
with your body going under each wave again and again,
you come up for air and breathe for the moment
knowing, it will come back again.
Each day is long and yet you have reasons to live.
What gives your life meaning now?
Your precious family, friends or your life’s work….does it all really matter?
Of course it does, this is all that matters.
This and your solid soul remembering to live.
Even with loss, immense loss, we must live.
Even when we don’t want to, even when it feels too hard.
What measure do we provide of the love we received from them to give up now?
Yes, we must live to show others how we have been forever changed by those who’ve gone before us.
We must pass it on.

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